Routine, or not Routine.

I figured out my problem.

Vacation sucks for the diet. I know, it's not some wild revelation, but ever since I got out of my work/school schedule, it's been impossible to stick to a true diet and keep up with a workout regime. I'm starting to learn that I'm either "all on", or "all off".

The good news is (and I can't believe I'm saying this), is that I go back to work this week, and then next week, school kicks back in. My schedule is flexible enough to allow PLENTY of time for working out into the day as well, so that's a bonus.

So, I need to get through the next few days, and get back into the routine. Tonight's New Year's Eve.. and what's better than actually having a resolution that you can actually accomplish?

Bar Hoppin'

Ok, so it's not really "hopping". And it's not really a bar. It's a hole in the wall named Bugsy's, and it's a Karaoke bar. I'm headed there in a few minutes, so this'll be short.

Today was again non-eventful. Worked a lot around the house, did some shopping for furniture (anyone recommend a good place near Detroit to pick up a 'plum' colored love seat?), and I'm headed to the bar with some friends.

Ate well, didn't go to the gym though. I'm regretting that. At least it's in my brain still. I'll probably go tomorrow, because I feel MUCH more motivated when I start the day in the gym. Again, a mental thing.. but then again, I'm mental.

Oh, and it's only a few days until New Years Eve, so if I'm going to do that 4-mile walk, I should probably round a few of you up, and get to it. My gym/athletic routine has been lacking lately.

Back in the Saddle

So, this morning, this is how the conversation went:


Wife: You should go to the gym, it's 9:00am and we have to head to Ann Arbor at 10:30am.
Me: I don't have time, there's so much to do around the house.
Wife: Go. You always say that you don't have time, and you do now, so go.
Me: I don't really want to.
Wife: You wanted people to get on your ass about going to the gym, so go. No excuses, just go.

Needless to say, I went to the gym this morning. Felt pretty good about it. Did 50 crunches (the kind you do with that big ball that you lay on and it kills you) and a half hour on the elypical machine. I feel pretty good about it. Ate healthy, and it feels like I'm finally back on track.

I also was able to get the entire office put together, and I can proudly say that I'm working in my office on my computer on the wireless internet that I wasn't able to use the past few weeks.

Things are looking up. First 'bright spot' in a while, but I'll definitely take it.

Until tomorrow.

Another Day

Nothing much to report here today. Didn't eat spectactular, but didn't really bend either. I wanted to hit the gym, but I spent yet ANOTHER day working on the house straight through the day, no breaks. Started around 9am, and didn't stop until around.. 4:30 or so. Just straight through. Finally got some major paint stains out of the carpets, got my office almost up and running (wireless ain't working yet), and then had some family over around 7ish until around 10:30. Running on fumes, but I told myself to NOT miss any more blogs, regardless of how boring.

Somehow, I've got to get in the gym. There's just NO time for it. I've got a few more days left to get this house in liveable condition, and I feel like I'm getting close to it. Erin (my wife for the new folks) and I have been working damn hard, and I'm proud to say that in the 12 days that we've owned the house, we're pretty much moved in, most the boxes packed away, and we're moved in.. almost. There's always something else to buy, install, put in, take out, fix, replace.. you name it, but it's worth it. I'm a first time home buyer, and I had NO idea how much there was to do.. and now I'm in the midst of it. I can't lie though, it's an exciting time of my life.

The problem is, my vacation is over on Monday. Back to the grind, full time work and full time school.. leaving very little time to get work done around the house. That's why I'm going full days on it. I know that I'll get back into a work/gym/school routine when the semester starts, but I don't want to wait that long.

Tomorrow, I spend the day in Ann Arbor helping my sister-in-law move into her place.

So, life continues, with or without me. My personal issues seem to have been worked out, so that's a bonus. Too many things on the checklist, but that one was a big one.

Nothing major to report, except for that I'm here, and I'm still going. Keep on me. If you guys hadn't have had those 12 comments waiting for me on the last blog, I probably would have moved on. It's scary how a few chains of events can knock you off track. Time to get back on the horse.

Gone But Not Forgotten

It's been almost a week since I posted, but I can promise you, it's not been more than a few hours since I've been thinking about you guys who follow this, and being able to type a blog.

Short explanation: I bought the house on the 15th, and I haven't been able to set up my office yet. My wireless isn't set up, so I'm using my wife's computer right now. I haven't been to work in a week, and between the holidays and painting, decorating, and doing those hundreds of things that you do when you buy a house.. it's just been to the point where I've spent literally no more than 5 minutes online per day since the house closing. For those of you who know me personally, I'm someone that spends HOURS a day online, and the shortage has effected the blog.

But, I'm back. I hope. I'm really going to try to keep posting as much as I can, and I really.. REALLY should keep posting every day. The truth is, with every bite that I take, I think of this blog. I honestly sit there and thing during each meal how important it is to keep this thing going strong, and bluntly.. I really.. REALLY appreciate those of you who have posted to urge me to continue.

Update on the diet...

It's been horrible. Just.. bad. Snacks at the holiday parties, many celebration meals, I could go on. Stress over the house, stress over the holidays, stress over some personal issues with a few friends of mine that I know read this.. things have really gotten to me mentally, and I just know that I haven't been nearly as strong as I need to be, and have quite bluntly failed miserably this week. I don't even want to THINK about what the scale says. I've worked my butt off in the house, and I'm just hoping that the physical energy I've spent doing 3 days of painting, lifting every box ever built, and these things have kept me maintained. I'm really.. really worried about weigh in. I haven't been to the gym in almost a week. I'm telling you, it's bad.

I've noticed something about myself. For those who know me, I'm pretty 'rock solid' when it comes to emotional issues, and I can handle pretty much anything thrown at me. But, there's been an issue lately with a few friends that has hit me pretty hard to the core. Usually I can shake things off, and put them on the back burner. Lately though, it's been as if something's missing in my life. And for those of you who live life like me.. you know where that leads you.

The cookie jar.

It's bad, but at least I'm conscious of it. Even as I type this at 12:30am, I know that it's not acceptable, and I'm using personal issues as an excuse to eat and not work out.

So what's the solution?

Stop being a puss.

I've got another huge day of work in front of me, but I'm going to eat better. I just have to. Personal issues may feel better after a sweet snack, but after it digests, it just makes me feel worse. Hell, I woke up sick to my stomach over personal issues this morning. Took it out on my wife. Got on her case over absolutely nothing, because things have been bothering me. I'm *NOT* that guy, and have never woken up mad about something the previous day.

So.. here it is again, new beginning #3,324,694.

Catch you tomorrow.

Thanks again for those of you who are sticking it out with me. You're saving my life.. in the literal sense of the word. It means a lot to me.

You Get What You Earn

Well.. it was a delayed weigh-in day, and I've got mixed feelings.

Notice that the name of the blog hasn't changed. When I weigh in, before I step on the scale I set the scale blocks to the exact same weight that I was the last time I weighed in, so when I step on the scale, the 'balance point' drops if I've dropped. Today, I set it, and it perfectly balanced when I stepped on the scale. I didn't gain a single pound in the last 9 days, but I didn't gain one either.

I want to be pissed off right now, but if I'm being real honest with myself, I'm lucky that I didn't go the wrong way. With the new house, we went out to dinner a few times for 'celebration' dinners, and just two nights ago I had a meal that I tried to convince myself that it was healthy, but I knew better. I've cheated here and there, had a bit of chocolate to go along with my buttery noodles, and I still balanced out even this week. Hell, this morning was my first time in the gym since Thursday.

So, as much as I am disappointed that the scale didn't show success, the honest truth is that I didn't earn that success. So, my focus is back. I'm re-energized. Sometimes you need a slap in the face to remind you that you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing, and it kicks back in. Again, without this blog, this may have been one of my many, many excuses to stop dieting and just put all the weight back on.

Oh, and for what it's worth, for those of you who read this, there's a new link on my "Friends Who Need Support" List on the front page of the blog, to your right. I browse a few weight loss websites, and I met a guy who needs your support the way myself, Kevin and Beck do. We're starting to start a coalition here, and Billy's our newest member. Please give his website the same support you do me, it's much appreciated.

So, another day, another pound. The next two weeks with the holidays are going to be one hell of a challenge.. one I plan on winning.

Home Sweet Home

We're moved in!

The house is in one piece, and there's still plenty of boxes lying around, but we've got everything that we own in the house, and most of our services ready to go. I still have to get AT&T out to the house to install some outlets (hence no internet at home yet, I'm blogging from work), and a ton more work to do, but the beef is between the patties. We're home.

So, I haven't been to the gym since the move, but I guarantee that I've done more working out in the past three days than I would have if I was in the gym. Up and down stairs with boxes, carrying, lifting, you name it, it was painstaking. I started to count my 'squats' as Josh had suggested, but I just lost count. For the last three days, it was pure chaos in its finest form. We busted our asses. And for those of you that read this and were able to help out, I really, really, REALLY appreciate you. Tom, Chris, Dad, Mel, Mark.. you're the man (ok, Chris and Mel.. not so much on the "man" part).

So, on the weight loss side, I haven't been able to weigh in this week, but I'm hoping to tomorrow. It just seems like every waking moment of my life needs to be dedicated to getting this house in order, but I've got to get my report up for this week as well.

I'll be around, and hopefully my few days of absence hasn't taken away from viewing this page. I'm always begging for comments, as they're the fuel to this machine. Wish me luck, as usual!

Closing Day!

I know, I know. I didn't blog yesterday. Every room in our townhouse looks like the picture to the left. It was the first day that I haven't since I started this. I was hoping to, but the internet was down at home, and since I was packing yesterday and I had already wasted a half hour on the phone with some half-wit at AT&T, I hung up on him, packed the computers up, and kept packing.

Today's a big day. It's 10:12am and I've just completed the first of my two Final Exams today. The one I just finished was the stressful one... the one that quite frankly, decided my fate between passing and failing, and in turn graduating in 2007 or 2009. Quite the big deal.

I hit a HOME RUN on it. Seriously. Anything less than a 99% and I'm taking him to the woodshed. So, I have a HUGE weight off of my shoulders.

Next up, a second exam.. and go ahead and laugh. It's my voice class, and I have to perform "I Move On" from the musical Chicago, and "Danny Boy".. you know, that old song from England. Needless to say, it's going to be.. interesting. Once that's done, I go sign the paperwork, and get the keys to our house.. oh, and drop off a check for $16,000 or something to go with the $10,000 we've already written a check for. Stress.

So, keeping the blog on the topic of health, thank you VERY much to those of you who replied to the last one. I just checked for the first time in a while, and with a day like this, those replies were well received. They gave me a pick-me-up for the rest of the day. There's a ton of work, and the next few weeks are going to be fun and difficult all at the same time, but it's good to know that I've got you guys to get my back, and keep on me when I need the strength. It helped a ton today.

Ok, so off I go. I probably won't blog tonight, and depending on how the move goes and if the internet connection is actually up tomorrow like they said it will be at the new place, I may or may not blog tomorrow. But know that I'm busting my tail, and my head is back where it needs to be.

Thanks, folks. Catch you soon.

Less than 48 hours until the Big Move

Life is chaos. Chaos is life.

The good news is, I'm way too busy for food. Life really hits you hard sometimes, and the stress of the situation takes hold of you, and alters your reality.

I didn't work out today, but I spent half the day busting my ass, packing boxes, lifting, pushing, packing, you name it. I broke a sweat multiple times, so that does count as a workout of some type.

I'm physically drained. I'm starting to feel weak, both physically and mentally, if I'm being honest. The last two days, the gym has dropped drastically on my priority list. I've got two finals on Friday that frankly, are really getting me down. The house is all-consuming, and even though I hide stress well, and the people in my life who are closest to me may not see it, I feel the weight of it on me. Just because I'm not throwing rocks at little children doesn't mean that I don't feel like the world is closing in.

How does this pertain to my health goals?

If it wasn't for this blog, this would be where I fell off the wagon. The cravings have returned these last few days, but I've fought them off. I actually went to Taco Bell tonight, which is the weakness upon weaknesses, but I got a chicken burrito, no cheese (and no tomato, but that's just because tomatoes taste like eyeballs). It was dry, so it was relatively good. It wasn't the best meal I could have, but it was the best I could do at the time.

So, as I said, this is where I would fall off the wagon. I'm just worn out. I'm not up for it. I'd much rather be on the couch sleeping, or in a little padded room pounding my head against the walls than work out, pack boxes, or even eat.

So here I am. Posting a blog. Not sure why, as it's pretty much me just whining, but I've committed myself to this thing, and for you guys who read this, reply, respond and give me strength, you're why I'm still doing this.

If you're the type to do it, pray for me this weekend. Others may roll their eyes, but if I can get through Thursday and Friday in one piece, and get the keys to my house and start that process, I think I may be able to keep this up.

And if you're NOT the type, just keep getting on my ass, and reminding myself why I'm putting my personal life into a blog for everyone to see.

Catch ya'll tomorrow.

3 Days Until The Big Move

Please, do not TOUCH the image to the left.

If there's one thing I've learned in life, it's that life comes at you in waves. Sometimes, you get into a rut and the "Same Old" hits you. You find yourself doing the same old thing, over and over, and your life becomes boring.

And sometimes, all of your big events happen at the same time.

This week is one of those weeks for me. I'll save THAT rant for another day, but I want to relate that to my health and diet. For some reason today, I really.. REALLY wanted to break the diet. I just had that craving.. that food addiction, take a wave over me today. I'm not sure why, but I think it's got to do with the stress levels that I've been dealing with lately. New promotions at work, having to meet call expectations at work, two finals staring me in the face along with closing on the house on Friday, it's a lot.

It's no secret that I'm an emotional eater. I get all worked up over life, and I retreat to the 99 cent Double Cheeseburger at McDonalds. It's just how I roll.


Thankfully for me, I had a healthy lunch, no cash in hand, and a wife that would beat me senseless if "Burger King" showed up on the credit card bill next month, especially since I've been working so hard.

So, just like Kevin said in one of his blogs a bit back, you feel like you're going to go on a binge, but you don't.. not because you don't *WANT* to, but because you can't get your hands on it.


Let's hear it for healthy packed lunches and empty wallets today. It saved me today.

Burning the Candle at Both Ends

Today I did something that I can't remember the last time that I did.

No, not eat a vegetable.

I worked out this morning, around 6:30-7:00am. Then, went to school and to work.. and then back to the gym for a workout with Josh the Destroyer.

Double dipping wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Doing those side-to-side drills with the boxing gloves on.. that was akin to burning in hell with no air-conditioning, but the two gym workouts in one day was pretty good.

So, I'm going to keep trying to double dip if I can. Not every night, but perhaps a few days a week. Go to the gym in the morning, just like normal, and on the days that I just come home form work, maybe stop in for a little bit. It took a long time to get to this size, and it's going to take an effort to get back down. If it's easy enough, why not?

One thing I noticed. Today I got one of those one serving bags of "Sugar Free" jellybeans, those fancy ones that taste like freaking everything. Weren't the greatest, but it was nice to get a bit of sugar in me, and for 0g of fan and only 90 calories, why not, right? I'll tell you why not.

My stomach is killing me for it. Whatever that substitute for flavor and sugar is did NOT agree.
So, here's a lesson for you folks keeping score at home.

If it ain't natural, don't eat it. Your gut will thank you for it.

Nothing Monumental

I told myself that I would blog EVERY single day, so here's my short one for tonight.

Woke up, went to the gym. Went to church. Went shopping. Went to dinner with my wife's family. Ate well, but I feel like I probably overdid it a little bit. I had 4 bites of cake (I could have done without it), and I picked a little bit, so today wasn't one of my stellar days. I wouldn't call it 'off the wagon', but a little bit more than I'm used to. Not thrilled about it, but it's not a killer either.

Tonight's blog is boring, but Josh the Destroyer is tomorrow. Should have something decent to report on tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Saturday Weigh-In

As the graphic shows, today was a good day. A week's worth of hard work has paid off, and I'm feeling pretty good about it. Josh The Destroyer predicted that I'd lose about 6 this week, and the guy is starting to look like Nostradamus.

Between Saturday and Tuesday, I lost 4 pounds. Between Tuesday and today..

ANOTHER 4 pounds.

That's right. In one of my first blogs, I was talking about how my last diet got me from a scary 379 down to 341, and then I felt content and soared back up to above 350.

It's taken me two weeks to get back down, as I'm now at 341 again.

Here's the difference: I'm happy to be back down to where I started, but I'm not content this time. I feel like I'm just starting to get into the swing, and I feel like I'm starting to get into a groove. For those who are interested in doing the New Year's Eve walk, let me know.

This is a lifestyle chance, and I'm a long, long way away from my goal. Hell, even the 100 pounds isn't my final goal, but it'll get me within striking distance of where I need to be. I feel great today, and maybe I've gotten to the end of the first chapter of the story, but there's plenty more story left in this book.

Keep the comments coming, it's like Spinach to Popeye for me.

TGIF

This was probably the longest week I've had in a long, long time. It seemed to go pretty well though. My problem is, the last two days I haven't been able to work out, and I feel like I dropped the ball on that. Tomorrow, I'm back in there, and with it being Saturday I think I'm going to push double hard and really try to work it out. Also, I'm working with "Josh the Destroyer" on Monday night (not Tuesday as mentioned earlier), so I'll be feeling it.

Tomorrow's weigh-in day, and I'm curious to see how I did. I've been working out (5 out of 7 days, not bad.. could be better), I've been eating VERY good, so I'm hoping for a big number. I have to remember that I've already got 4 pounds in the bank for this week when I weighed in on Tuesday, so I'm hoping for something good.

Also, for those of you who have expressed interest about doing the 4-mile walk with me on New Year's Eve, here are some specifics. It's considered a "fitness walk", so I don't have to feel like a moron walking as people BLAZE past me on full speed. The walk starts at 3:05pm on New Year's Eve, so we'll have plenty of time to get back before any festivities. Here's a link to the flyer that is basically the sign up sheet. If you guys are serious, let me know, because I really want to do this.

http://www.michiganrunner.com/belleisle/

So, let me know. Oh, and hopefully everyone's still reading this. I've gotten a dramatic drop in comments, but I'm just hoping it's because the last few days have been incredibly boring blog-wise. I'll do better, I promise.

Ok, bedtime. Tomorrow will be an important blog. Hopefully, the title of this blog will be different tomorrow. Until then!

Boring Day, Boring Blog

Not much to mention today, so I thought I'd post that picture. Fitting for my life, to a tee.

I skipped the gym this morning just because I needed the break. I've worked hard this week, both in the gym, and at school and at work, and the string of 6am-11:30pm days were starting to get to me, so I took a breather.

I felt guilty for not hitting the gym.

I ate well, and I'm doing good at resisting temptations. My hunger is starting to go away, and I'm noticing that I'm getting filled up with much smaller meals. All in all, I'm on the right track.

So, no big news. I'm still on the wagon, hanging in there.

There's a staff Christmas luncheon next Thursday. That's my next big challenge.

Oh, and I really need to decide if I'm going to do that 4 mile walk on New Year's Eve, but I haven't looked into it, and more importantly, haven't trained for it. I don't want to go unprepared like last time. Anyone up for it?

Feelin' Fruity

Another day in the books.

I'm starting to feel like I'm getting into a groove and that this is starting to get easier. After a LONG day yesterday and not even getting back to the house until after 10:30, and not to bed until after 11:30, I popped right up this morning at the sound of the 6:00am bell, and was out the door to the gym before 6:20am. It felt pretty good.

I noticed that the past few days, I've just 'skipped' breakfast, as I'm trying to rush out the door. I got the business from a few of you yesterday for that, so today I can say that I had a glass of orange juice and an apple on the way to school/work. Not exactly the Aunt Jemima breakfast, but it's in the right direction.

It's kind of wierd, because I feel like I may be "overdoing" it, but the "more, the merrier" is my mindset. I mean, we're talking about being 350 pounds. I've been "overdoing" it the wrong way for a long, long time. I'm pretty motivated, and I'm feeling good about the steps that I'm skipping.

Question for "Josh the Destroyer", and anyone else with advice:

What's a good 'take-along' breakfast? Something I can open the fridge, grab, and run out the door with? Even though I had the orange juice and apple today, there's not a ton of protein there. So, thoughts? It's one of those "wake up, grab your gym clothes, grab your school work, throw it over your shoulder, and run out the door" type of lives.

Advice?

The First Big Jump

Remember how frustrated I was two days ago, on Sunday?

Today's Tuesday, and I was in the gym this morning, and I struggled with my workout. On my non-"Josh The Destroyer" days, I do 30 minutes of hard cardio, usually on the Elyptical Machine, which is the exercise equivalent of hell. I'm not exaggerating. It's like being sent to Hades. Fire and brimstone. Home of Timothy McVeigh, Adolf Hitler and the Yellow Wiggles Character.

So, remember how I said that I'll only weigh myself on Saturdays? Remember how I lied last week, and weighed myself on Tuesday?

Lied again.

Good news this time. Down *FOUR* pounds in 2 days.

What' s that tell me?

It tells me that I'm in the right direction. It also reminds me that the body fluxuates, but I'm on the right path. It also tells me that these morning workouts are starting to pay off.

One thing I've been doing lately is starting to eat ONLY when hungry, and not relying on the clock to eat. Example? I usually wake up, eat breakfast the moment I wake up, and then I'm hungry again by 9am. For the last few days, if I'm not hungry when I wake up, then I just don't eat. When I start feeling hungry, that's when I eat. Then, I eat small and slow. Just enough to fill up, and not because I feel I'm 'owed' a meal.

For instance, it's 11am. I went to the gym, and didn't even think about eating breakfast. I was too rushed, and just ran out the door. I started to get a bit hungry on the way from school to work, so I reached into my lunchbox and grabbed my little pineapple serving and chugged it down. I feel fine now.

I'm not sure if 'skipping' meals is good, but I don't see the point in eating when I'm not hungry. I understand the concept of 5-6 meals a day, but my problem is that in the past, those weren't a meal of 1 snack bar, or an apple, or a carrot. Those were 5-6 MEALS. Big Macs. Whoppers. Pizzas.

If I'm hungry, I'll eat. If not, I won't. It's such a simple concept, I'm probably doing it wrong.

Have I mentioned I was down 4 pounds from Sunday?

Nothing Too Exciting

Another day, another dollar.

A long, LONG day, to be followed up with 4 more just like it.

I wasn't able to get to the gym today, but I followed it up by eating like a champ. Nice and even, and I even was caught gnawing on carrot sticks today. The kind of the actual green thing at the top that Bugs Bunny chews on, and not those wierd little Carrot Toes or whatever the mini-carrots are. The real deal.

After I read Kevin's blog ("The 100", it's in my "Important Link section to the right), I was glad to see that he's been having successes, and I'm going to get those same successes. Yesterday was tough mentally because of the non-weight loss, but your comments are helping. I felt pretty good rebounding mentally, and came back with a few picture perfect eating days.

I'm going to head to the gym at 6am tomorrow morning, even though I won't see my place again until after 9:30pm. No pain, no gain, right? I also scheduled my next workout with "Josh the Destroyer", next Tuesday at 6:30pm.

So, stay tuned. This next week is going to be a blur, but it's going to be a strong one. I feel good about it.

One Up.

Ok, a bit frustrated today.

Here's the timeline:

7:30am - Crawl out of bed, no alarm. Just woke up.
8:00am - Head to the gym.
8:30am - Amazing work out. I did my regular cardio that I usually struggle with, and then I felt so good that I went and did the majority of my weights workout that it usually reserved for when I'm working out with Josh. The medicine ball squats, laying on that ball and doing crunches, bench presses, more crunches, more medicine ball squats, you name it. I nailed it. I felt GREAT.
9:30am - The weekly weigh-in.

349.

You've got to be kidding me.

I went *UP* a pound this week.

I don't understand how that happened. I've eaten well, I worked out 5-6 times this week, I was completely active. I don't get it.

This is the time where, if I wasn't providing this blog, I was say "screw it", and head to Taco Bell.

I'm pretty pissed off about this right now. I honestly felt like I was doing everything right this week, and was looking for a big drop. I went into the gym, and through my workout on a big time high, and the bubble burst.

It takes about a half hour to drive from the gym to home, and the entire time I'm looking back at the week. I guess I 'picked' a bit here, 'picked' a bit there. Had Wendy's twice for dinner this week (but it's a grilled chicken sandwich with only lettuce and yellow mustard) and a yogurt with lowfat granola, so I thought I was in the clear.

It's time to go strict.

Josh, if/when you read this, I need to get with you about setting up something strict. I mean, like exact meals. Times to eat them. Whatever it takes for me to knock this weight out.

Very, very frustrated today.

Time Is My Enemy

Today was pretty non-eventful. It was a busy day, but I feel like health-wise, I didn't get anything accomplished. I did bell-ringing out in the 30 degree weather for the Salvation Army, so that was mentally rewarding, but I just stood around for two hours. Unfortunately, that was my 'workout' for the day. I got home, then went to a concert, and then over to the wife's family's house to hang out, and now, at 11:30pm, I'm home.

So, no weigh-in today. Not really thrilled about that, but I'll get one in tomorrow I hope.

I'm hitting my 8 day stretch where life is a STRUGGLE. I don't think there's a day this week starting tonight that I'm going to be home before 8:30pm, and each of those days I'm out of the house by 7:15am.. or 6:00am if I get up for the gym, so I'm hoping to see a few early days.

It's frustrating when you actually WANT to go to the gym, but have no time. I know I can do things outside of the gym like walk, do the stretches, squats, jumping jacks, but honestly, if I'm not at the gym, I don't feel 'into' it. I can't seem to get into the mode without being actually AT the gym. Maybe that's a cop-out, but I have to call it how I see it. I guess it's more mental sometimes with me. I feel like, if I'm not actually in the gym, the exercise doesn't really count. Completely stupid, I know, but again, just speaking what I think.

So, it's struggle time. The next few weeks for me are going to be crazy, and this is usually the time where my diet falls right on its ass. It's a crunch time for me.

Sorry the blog's boring today. Nothing really true to report. I guess because I'm making a point to write EVERY SINGLE DAY, you'll get some boring ones. Stay tuned though, I need you guys. All of you.

TGIF!

Today was one of those up and down days.

I woke up as I challenged myself to, and I worked out. I went to school and work, and then directly to my wife's Work Christmas Party. This is going to be a short blog because I just walked into the door, it's almost midnight, and this is the first time I've been home since 6am. I'm simply exhausted.

Tomorrow, I ring bells for Salvation Army from 11-1, and then have a student from 1:30-2:00, and then I have a concert to attend downtown at 7:30, it just never stops. I know I'll get some cardio in at the gym somewhere in the middle.

Here's my problem. I ate stellar today. I worked out. I did it all.

And then at dinner, I had a half piece of cheesecake and the equivalent of a can of beer.

I know, that's NOTHING. I worked it off in dancing at the party, probably.

But, I eat it because it's in front of me, and I sit back and wonder why. It wasn't that good, and I just ate it because I did. Nothing detrimental, and I'm not off the wagon by any stretch.. but it just doesn't sit good with me mentally, you know? I mean, how about.. instead of eating the cheesecake after working out, skip the cheesecake AND the workout, and break even?

I know that doesn't make sense, but it's one of my struggles.

Another one of my struggles is keeping my eyes open after an 18 hour day. I'm just beat.

Catch you tomorrow.