It's been almost a week since I posted, but I can promise you, it's not been more than a few hours since I've been thinking about you guys who follow this, and being able to type a blog.
Short explanation: I bought the house on the 15th, and I haven't been able to set up my office yet. My wireless isn't set up, so I'm using my wife's computer right now. I haven't been to work in a week, and between the holidays and painting, decorating, and doing those hundreds of things that you do when you buy a house.. it's just been to the point where I've spent literally no more than 5 minutes online per day since the house closing. For those of you who know me personally, I'm someone that spends HOURS a day online, and the shortage has effected the blog.
But, I'm back. I hope. I'm really going to try to keep posting as much as I can, and I really.. REALLY should keep posting every day. The truth is, with every bite that I take, I think of this blog. I honestly sit there and thing during each meal how important it is to keep this thing going strong, and bluntly.. I really.. REALLY appreciate those of you who have posted to urge me to continue.
Update on the diet...
It's been horrible. Just.. bad. Snacks at the holiday parties, many celebration meals, I could go on. Stress over the house, stress over the holidays, stress over some personal issues with a few friends of mine that I know read this.. things have really gotten to me mentally, and I just know that I haven't been nearly as strong as I need to be, and have quite bluntly failed miserably this week. I don't even want to THINK about what the scale says. I've worked my butt off in the house, and I'm just hoping that the physical energy I've spent doing 3 days of painting, lifting every box ever built, and these things have kept me maintained. I'm really.. really worried about weigh in. I haven't been to the gym in almost a week. I'm telling you, it's bad.
I've noticed something about myself. For those who know me, I'm pretty 'rock solid' when it comes to emotional issues, and I can handle pretty much anything thrown at me. But, there's been an issue lately with a few friends that has hit me pretty hard to the core. Usually I can shake things off, and put them on the back burner. Lately though, it's been as if something's missing in my life. And for those of you who live life like me.. you know where that leads you.
The cookie jar.
It's bad, but at least I'm conscious of it. Even as I type this at 12:30am, I know that it's not acceptable, and I'm using personal issues as an excuse to eat and not work out.
So what's the solution?
Stop being a puss.
I've got another huge day of work in front of me, but I'm going to eat better. I just have to. Personal issues may feel better after a sweet snack, but after it digests, it just makes me feel worse. Hell, I woke up sick to my stomach over personal issues this morning. Took it out on my wife. Got on her case over absolutely nothing, because things have been bothering me. I'm *NOT* that guy, and have never woken up mad about something the previous day.
So.. here it is again, new beginning #3,324,694.
Catch you tomorrow.
Thanks again for those of you who are sticking it out with me. You're saving my life.. in the literal sense of the word. It means a lot to me.
4 comments:
Glad to have you back, Rob. Everybody falls off the wagon, especially this time of year. Just recognize that it was a speed bump, not a road block. You've slowed down, but you're still going.
Welcome back, Rob! Kevin said it best. I can't really add to it without rambling. But hell, I'll ramble anyway. Just hang in there. I obviously don't know what personal issues you're dealing with, but it sounds intense. Just don't give up! Remember how you feel after you eat that cookie or candy bar or pint of ice cream (or all three...in one sitting...been there, done that). Just think about it BEFORE you eat it. It's not going to make your problem(s) go away, it'll only add to them. Be strong and don't give up!
Glad your back.
First of all, you'd better not have a cookie jar in your house. One of the best things you can do for yourself is start your brand new kitchen off on a clean slate- if there's only healthy things in it, you can't eat crap (without making an effort, which, hopefully you won't).
Secondly, shit happens. I'm sorry you're having all of these stressors in your life, but it's good that you're recognizing that it's making you want to eat.
Finally, the only thing you can do wrong is to give up. As long as you are willing to pick up, dust yourself off, and keep going despite setbacks, then you are succeeding.
Do yourself a favor- get to the gym. For a week. And get your diet back on track. THEN weigh yourself :)
Hey there...I myself have hardly been online, and I was thinking the other day "ah shit...I promised to be there for Rob, and during the crazy time ever, I drop the ball". I still feel bad, but not as bad as I might have if I had gotten on here to find you had been posting everday and no one was there for ya!
Anyway, I like what Billy said...skip the weigh in this week...get back on track, refocus and then see where you're at. The last thing you need right now is to stress yourself out some more.
You could have very easily given up during all this, and said forget it. The fact that you got back on here, bluntly put it out there publicly where you'd slipped up and are able to see exactly what trips you up, is a very good sign. You know where you're weak, and you know what sets you off. Avoid those triggers as much as possible, and because you can't always, prepare yourself on how you might handle the stress. Does that make sense???
Ok, so anyway, I'm glad you're back, for what it's worth. You know you've got a friend right here that you can turn to whenever you need anything. Support, encouragement, a ear to vent into...whatever!
Keep hanging in there, get re-focused and get back to the gym. You can do this! I have a lot of faith in you!
Take care buddy!
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