I talked to Kevin tonight, Erin's been on me, a few of you have asked, and I've been wondering myself.
Why haven't I blogged?
I don't know. I just have been dragging ass and feeling completely motivated. This is the tough, yet confusing, part for me.
I work out SEVEN days a week. I play basketball on Tuesdays, softball the past few Saturdays, go for runs, bike rides with my wife - I'm active. I'm REALLY active, and I feel great about it.
But my eating is piss poor. And I don't mean 'cheat' meals. I eat the right stuff. I'm just eating a LOT of it. My serving sizes are WAY too big - I go back for seconds when I don't want them, I pick all day, I grab all the snacky shit at work and at school. Kid at school offers me a brownie? Sure, pass it along. Work has cake for someone's birthday? Pass it to me.
I *NEVER* fell into that. My problem was always the fast food and the bad stuff in large quantities. Now, it seems like I'm always hungry, and I've fallen back into the thing where I start thinking about the next meal the MOMENT this one's done. I'm falling back into these old feelings of weakness and self doubt, and I really don't like myself right now.
I've seen everything form 268 to 282 these past two weeks. It's infuriating. Right now, I'm somewhere in the middle. Hell, I've even been avoiding my SCALE. And for those of you who have read my blog more than once, you know how much I'm obsessed by that damn thing.
Either way, maybe it's turning around. I got two hours of GOOD basketball in tonight, and I came home wanting to eat (of course). Instead, it's gatorade and that's it. Softball is starting up, and I got my "Race for the Cure" packet in the mail. 5k race at the end of the month - I should start preparing and getting in the mood for it.
So - hang in there with me. I know, this is the same old story. It's just a matter of picking myself up - slapping myself in the face to get rid of the pity party, and moving forward. At least the active lifestyle is winning. Now, I need the healthy eating lifestyle part to be figured out. Keep pushing me.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Same Old Song?
Weigh In: 273.4
You could already predict that the weight went up due to me not blogging since Friday.
This isn't going to be the 'poor me' blog, we've all seen this too many times to count. I was talking to Kevin last night playing hoops and he said that he had a feeling that I wasn't doing so well since he hadn't seen a blog from me in a while. That's partially true (ok, about 99% of it), but I've been pretty busy lately too - many nights not seeing the house until after 8 or 9pm, after leaving to start my day at or before 6am. It drains you.
It's a combination of things sometimes that we really have to pay attention to. I wouldn't say that I 'fell off the wagon' and started eating the 'bad food'. I didn't stop working out - in fact, I don't think I've missed a day in the gym in a few weeks, and I've probably been either in the gym or on a long 2-4 mile run 28 out of the past 30 days. I've been pretty good.
Portion sizes and eating later at night is such a trap for me. I do really well all day long - in fact, I probably eat not enough during the day - and perhaps that's the problem. I get home, and I've always had dinner be the full, satisfying meal of the day. My meals have been bigger, I've been having seconds - I even had ice cream a few nights ago at 9:30 at night.
See, the ice cream I don't really have an issue with - I've been able to be faithful to eating it out of the 1/2 cup measuring cup. 140 calories, 2-3 grams of fat. I honestly have no issue with that. But the unscheduled eating of said ice cream at 9:30 at night after having 2 helping of dinner? That's what is not acceptable.
It's easy to keep the eye on the prize when the schedule fits and everything else is working how it's supposed to. The minute you take your eye off the road though - that's when you crash the car.
I'm not being myself up over 273 - but it's kind of disheartening.
Here's some good news - after MONTHS, I finally got Gary back on the program. He signed up at my community center this morning and we're back on track. He went from 280 or so and got down to 236 or something like that while working out with me in the past. He fell off the wagon and ended up gaining the weight back. It sucks, but it's something we've ALL done before.
No shame in that - but you use that as fuel to learn from your mistakes. As I see it - the only person that fails is the one that gives up. He's back with me, and that'll help both of us. For him to even come to me and want to get back into it - I respect the hell out of that. Also, one thing that he mentioned that I will be blatantly stealing is a trick that worked for him. At dinner, instead of using a full sized plate, he uses a small saucer. Whatever he can fit on that saucer, he eats. Total mind trick, and I don't doubt for a second that it works. I'll be stealing that one.
Hope everyone is doing well - keep strong.
You could already predict that the weight went up due to me not blogging since Friday.
This isn't going to be the 'poor me' blog, we've all seen this too many times to count. I was talking to Kevin last night playing hoops and he said that he had a feeling that I wasn't doing so well since he hadn't seen a blog from me in a while. That's partially true (ok, about 99% of it), but I've been pretty busy lately too - many nights not seeing the house until after 8 or 9pm, after leaving to start my day at or before 6am. It drains you.
It's a combination of things sometimes that we really have to pay attention to. I wouldn't say that I 'fell off the wagon' and started eating the 'bad food'. I didn't stop working out - in fact, I don't think I've missed a day in the gym in a few weeks, and I've probably been either in the gym or on a long 2-4 mile run 28 out of the past 30 days. I've been pretty good.
Portion sizes and eating later at night is such a trap for me. I do really well all day long - in fact, I probably eat not enough during the day - and perhaps that's the problem. I get home, and I've always had dinner be the full, satisfying meal of the day. My meals have been bigger, I've been having seconds - I even had ice cream a few nights ago at 9:30 at night.
See, the ice cream I don't really have an issue with - I've been able to be faithful to eating it out of the 1/2 cup measuring cup. 140 calories, 2-3 grams of fat. I honestly have no issue with that. But the unscheduled eating of said ice cream at 9:30 at night after having 2 helping of dinner? That's what is not acceptable.
It's easy to keep the eye on the prize when the schedule fits and everything else is working how it's supposed to. The minute you take your eye off the road though - that's when you crash the car.
I'm not being myself up over 273 - but it's kind of disheartening.
Here's some good news - after MONTHS, I finally got Gary back on the program. He signed up at my community center this morning and we're back on track. He went from 280 or so and got down to 236 or something like that while working out with me in the past. He fell off the wagon and ended up gaining the weight back. It sucks, but it's something we've ALL done before.
No shame in that - but you use that as fuel to learn from your mistakes. As I see it - the only person that fails is the one that gives up. He's back with me, and that'll help both of us. For him to even come to me and want to get back into it - I respect the hell out of that. Also, one thing that he mentioned that I will be blatantly stealing is a trick that worked for him. At dinner, instead of using a full sized plate, he uses a small saucer. Whatever he can fit on that saucer, he eats. Total mind trick, and I don't doubt for a second that it works. I'll be stealing that one.
Hope everyone is doing well - keep strong.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Weekend
Weigh In: 270.2
That kind of sucked. Snuck up again - but I didn't want to feel TOO bad about it. I had a LOOONG night last night where I had two bottled waters after 11pm. Didn't want to eat anything or add calories, but I'm assuming that played a role in seeing the weight go up in the AM.
Lame, but what can you do?
Tomorrow's just as busy - the weekend, the time for "rest", right?
Cutting this short - hoping tomorrow's a little more 'scale' friendly. I've got some weight to drop still.
That kind of sucked. Snuck up again - but I didn't want to feel TOO bad about it. I had a LOOONG night last night where I had two bottled waters after 11pm. Didn't want to eat anything or add calories, but I'm assuming that played a role in seeing the weight go up in the AM.
Lame, but what can you do?
Tomorrow's just as busy - the weekend, the time for "rest", right?
Cutting this short - hoping tomorrow's a little more 'scale' friendly. I've got some weight to drop still.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Ideas?
In my most recent post I talked about a program that I'm going to start running around town. I'm brainstorming ideas on things that would be most helpful.
Basically, we're looking to work with kids and possibly the parents when it comes to almost a "FIT camp" - a combination of exercises, fun activities, nutritional guidance and possible motivational speakers and tips to help these families eat and live healthier lives.
I'm thinking of what we've done in the past - and things that may have worked for you, that you think would benefit a program like this. We're talking about working with the families from within - both with the kids to show them that sports can be fun (some of these kids would feel uncomfortable playing with their 'healthy' peers), and we also want to approach the parents with educational materials - for example, showing visuals with measuring out HOW MUCH SUGAR is in a can of pop (measure out the sugar and physically show them) - as well as giving them healthy alternatives.
I want this to be the best possible program to reach out to the people who need it most.
So - what do you think would work in a program like this? If you were a parent with a child in this scenario, what would YOU want to see?
Thanks!
Basically, we're looking to work with kids and possibly the parents when it comes to almost a "FIT camp" - a combination of exercises, fun activities, nutritional guidance and possible motivational speakers and tips to help these families eat and live healthier lives.
I'm thinking of what we've done in the past - and things that may have worked for you, that you think would benefit a program like this. We're talking about working with the families from within - both with the kids to show them that sports can be fun (some of these kids would feel uncomfortable playing with their 'healthy' peers), and we also want to approach the parents with educational materials - for example, showing visuals with measuring out HOW MUCH SUGAR is in a can of pop (measure out the sugar and physically show them) - as well as giving them healthy alternatives.
I want this to be the best possible program to reach out to the people who need it most.
So - what do you think would work in a program like this? If you were a parent with a child in this scenario, what would YOU want to see?
Thanks!
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
An Honor and Privilege
I already talked about my weigh in today, but I want to tell you guys a story that I think each and every single one of you will appreciate.
I'm looking for a second job to help supplement my income when I'm doing my student teaching, and through craigslist.com I found a woman is is pretty deeply involved in youth sports programs. We had this meeting tonight - her, I and about 5 other folks, about different programs to run in the area. Soccer camps, football leagues - those types of things. Things that you would find in a Parks & Recs program book.
We partnered up, and I ended up talking to a guy named Kenny. He's doing his student teaching like I am, and he's a basketball coach at one of the local high schools. Long story made short, we had to come up with a program to run - something that will benefit kids.
He mentioned doing a "fit camp".
He had no idea on my background, or my weight history. This, I believe, is a calling that was given to me - an opportunity that I was blessed with. We discussed this for 3 hours - from 8:30 tonight until about 11:30 - it's 11:45pm as I write this.
The two of us are going to run a fit camp - a "Biggest Loser" meets "Shaq's Big Challenge" type of camp. It's going to be classes of approximately 20 people - geared towards families - to help them get fit, lose weight, and live a healthy lifestyle. The details aren't worked out yet - we're meeting again tomorrow night, but the goal is there. Motivational speakers (Michigan FAT members, are you listening?) - working with nutritional lessons, showing them how to eat right, make better decisions when it comes to preparing food and eating out - promoting exercise - you name it - that's the process we're going through to work out the details.
There's so much more to figure out - but we're going to have this up and running in the next few weeks. My head is spnning right now with the endless possibilities - I want this to be about helping people discover a healthy life - and this is the opportunity to pay it forward that I was given.
I'm blessed for even having this opportunity, and I'm going to make the best of it. I'm not sure the details yet - but I know this - we're GOING to be doing this. We're going to be able to show these families - these adults, kids, brothers and sisters, best friends - whoever want to do this - how to do what all FAT members know works: how to be accountable for your decisions, what those right decisions consist of - and how it will affect them in the long run. Everything from these nutritional plans to helping them with exercise to giving them the support system that they need to make a difference.
You can tell by this blog that my mind is ALL over the place.
I'm going to be able to make a difference where it counts - in my own community. We're talking tentatively classes of about 20, and probably 4-6 classes.
I can't tell you how happy I am to be given this chance. I am going to bring EVERYTHING I'VE GOT to the table. This is what it's all about.
I'm looking for a second job to help supplement my income when I'm doing my student teaching, and through craigslist.com I found a woman is is pretty deeply involved in youth sports programs. We had this meeting tonight - her, I and about 5 other folks, about different programs to run in the area. Soccer camps, football leagues - those types of things. Things that you would find in a Parks & Recs program book.
We partnered up, and I ended up talking to a guy named Kenny. He's doing his student teaching like I am, and he's a basketball coach at one of the local high schools. Long story made short, we had to come up with a program to run - something that will benefit kids.
He mentioned doing a "fit camp".
He had no idea on my background, or my weight history. This, I believe, is a calling that was given to me - an opportunity that I was blessed with. We discussed this for 3 hours - from 8:30 tonight until about 11:30 - it's 11:45pm as I write this.
The two of us are going to run a fit camp - a "Biggest Loser" meets "Shaq's Big Challenge" type of camp. It's going to be classes of approximately 20 people - geared towards families - to help them get fit, lose weight, and live a healthy lifestyle. The details aren't worked out yet - we're meeting again tomorrow night, but the goal is there. Motivational speakers (Michigan FAT members, are you listening?) - working with nutritional lessons, showing them how to eat right, make better decisions when it comes to preparing food and eating out - promoting exercise - you name it - that's the process we're going through to work out the details.
There's so much more to figure out - but we're going to have this up and running in the next few weeks. My head is spnning right now with the endless possibilities - I want this to be about helping people discover a healthy life - and this is the opportunity to pay it forward that I was given.
I'm blessed for even having this opportunity, and I'm going to make the best of it. I'm not sure the details yet - but I know this - we're GOING to be doing this. We're going to be able to show these families - these adults, kids, brothers and sisters, best friends - whoever want to do this - how to do what all FAT members know works: how to be accountable for your decisions, what those right decisions consist of - and how it will affect them in the long run. Everything from these nutritional plans to helping them with exercise to giving them the support system that they need to make a difference.
You can tell by this blog that my mind is ALL over the place.
I'm going to be able to make a difference where it counts - in my own community. We're talking tentatively classes of about 20, and probably 4-6 classes.
I can't tell you how happy I am to be given this chance. I am going to bring EVERYTHING I'VE GOT to the table. This is what it's all about.
Chase It
Goal: Lose 10 Pounds in April
April 1 - 272.0
Today's Weigh In: 267.6
4.4 down, 5.6 to go!
Basketball went great last night - I'm COMPLETELY wiped out. When the alarm went off this morning my body did NOT want to get up. Totally sore from the pores of my feet to the bald spot on the top of my head.
So I went downstairs and weighed in. I got a 268.6.
As is my routine every day, I go to the gym in the morning and then come home and weigh in again. My post-workout weigh-in is the one I count for my official daily weigh in. Some would say that's cheating, but the way I see it - the pre-workout weigh in motivates the hell out of me. I know that whatever I see before my workout is going to be almost a full pound LESS when I get home and weigh in again.
Honestly, that fact in itself is what motivates me to go to the gym 7 days a week.
When I woke up this morning, I just knew I wasn't going to hit the gym. I was sore, tired, I had a HUGE headache.. I just wasn't going to do it. But when I saw that 268.8.. I knew the potential for seeing the 268 was real. My body immediately changed its mind, and WANTED to go to the gym so I could see it on the scale.
That's what motivates me.
267.6
My old "new low" from months ago was 266.6. I haven't seen that number in months - and I haven't seen anything LOWER than that in the past 10 years.
Find what motivates you. Chase it.
Earn it.
April 1 - 272.0
Today's Weigh In: 267.6
4.4 down, 5.6 to go!
Basketball went great last night - I'm COMPLETELY wiped out. When the alarm went off this morning my body did NOT want to get up. Totally sore from the pores of my feet to the bald spot on the top of my head.
So I went downstairs and weighed in. I got a 268.6.
As is my routine every day, I go to the gym in the morning and then come home and weigh in again. My post-workout weigh-in is the one I count for my official daily weigh in. Some would say that's cheating, but the way I see it - the pre-workout weigh in motivates the hell out of me. I know that whatever I see before my workout is going to be almost a full pound LESS when I get home and weigh in again.
Honestly, that fact in itself is what motivates me to go to the gym 7 days a week.
When I woke up this morning, I just knew I wasn't going to hit the gym. I was sore, tired, I had a HUGE headache.. I just wasn't going to do it. But when I saw that 268.8.. I knew the potential for seeing the 268 was real. My body immediately changed its mind, and WANTED to go to the gym so I could see it on the scale.
That's what motivates me.
267.6
My old "new low" from months ago was 266.6. I haven't seen that number in months - and I haven't seen anything LOWER than that in the past 10 years.
Find what motivates you. Chase it.
Earn it.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Hoop Dreams
Goal: Lose 10 Pounds in April
April 1 - 272.0
Today's Weigh In: 269.8
2.4 down, 7.6 to go!
I seem to be locked into the 269 point. It's a bit stressful every time I step on the scale in the morning, as strange as that might sound.
I hit the gym this morning but have basketball tonight - Kevin's been dealing with illness so hopefully he'll be ok to play, but either way I'll have 2 hours hauling ass up and down the court tonight. Really looking forward to it.
I don't know why but I've had this major case of writer's block when it comes to this blog lately. I don't really have much to say - but I feel like I need to post more.
It's tax day - April 15th. That means a few things - one, sucks for you if you don't have your taxes done yet. Two, we're 50% through the month, and I'm falling short of my 10 pounds in April goal. Time to step it up a notch.
April 1 - 272.0
Today's Weigh In: 269.8
2.4 down, 7.6 to go!
I seem to be locked into the 269 point. It's a bit stressful every time I step on the scale in the morning, as strange as that might sound.
I hit the gym this morning but have basketball tonight - Kevin's been dealing with illness so hopefully he'll be ok to play, but either way I'll have 2 hours hauling ass up and down the court tonight. Really looking forward to it.
I don't know why but I've had this major case of writer's block when it comes to this blog lately. I don't really have much to say - but I feel like I need to post more.
It's tax day - April 15th. That means a few things - one, sucks for you if you don't have your taxes done yet. Two, we're 50% through the month, and I'm falling short of my 10 pounds in April goal. Time to step it up a notch.
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